quarta-feira, 9 de junho de 2010

Português; A língua mais conhecida do mundo!

Acho que não, mas, se seu inglês estiver enferrujadinho pode ser que precise traduzir algo... Vale cada segundo da leitura!!!

É SÉRIO !!!

A cada dia o Português vem se tornando uma língua mais conhecida.

Veja, por exemplo, o e-mail abaixo, enviado diretamente do RH da matriz
americana de uma empresa, direcionado aos funcionários americanos da filial
brasileira, localizada em Gravataí, RS:


It has been brought to our attention by several officials visiting
our corporate headquarters, that offensive language is commonly used by our
portuguese-speaking staff, and to be precise, by YOU. Such behavior, in
addition to violating our policy, is highly unprofessional and offensive to
both visitors and colleagues.

Staff will IMMEDIATELY adhere to the following rules:

1 - Words like caralho, cacete, porra or puta que o pariu and other
such expressions will not be used for emphasis, no matter how heated the
discussion is.

2 - You will not say cagada when someone makes a mistake, or está
fazendo cagada if you see somebody either being reprimanded or making a
mistake, or o que é um peido prá quem já está cagado when a major mistake
has been made. All forms derivated from the verb cagar are unappropiate in
our environment.

3 - No project manager, section head or administrator, under any
circunstances, will be referred to as filho da puta, pentelho, o grande come
merda or vaca gorda, vá para a puta que te pariu.

4 - Lack of determination will not be referred to as falta de culhão
or coisa de boiola and neither will persons with lack of initiative be referred
to as puto, corno, cagão or viado.

5 - Unusual or creative ideas from your superiors are not to be
referred to as masturbações mentais.

6 - Do not say como enche o saco este pentelho if a person
is persistent, when a task is heavy to accomplish remember that you must not
say é foda.

In a similar way, do not use esse cara está fudido if a colleague is
going through a difficult situation. Furthermore, you must not say que foda
when matters become complicated.

7 - When asking someone to leave you alone, you must not say vai a
merda.

Do not ever substitute 'May I help you?' with que porra você quer ?
When things get tough, an acceptable expression such as 'We are going
through a difficult time' should be used, rather than estamos fudidos or
isto aquí está foda, or puta que o pariu!!!.

8 - No salary increase shall be ever referred to as aumentinho de
merda or merreca do caralho..

9 - Under no circumstances should you call our elderly corporate
partners velhos pentelhos or velhos escrotos.

10 - Last, but not least, after reading this memo please, do not say
vou limpar o cu com esta merda! Just keep it clean and dispose of it
properly.

We hope you will keep these directions in mind.

Thank you,

Human Resources Department

Um comentário:

  1. kkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk...........caralho mano!!! Chorei de rir com esta porra.......muito bom negão.....

    Beijos,
    Gui

    ResponderExcluir